When the ones you love the hardest are suffering and you’re unable to stop it, it’s isolating and terrifying. The pain is sharp and heavy, almost unbearable. I felt like that yesterday. But God showed up for me in a gifted bag of donuts from a new Cambodian friend; in holy conversation with an old … Continue reading Loved, not abandoned
"I wanna be one of those summer moms who makes bucket lists and pool trips and spoils dinner with ice cream,” I lament to Jay while putting groceries away on Saturday. I envy the summer moms. I see them strolling the neighborhood in their top knots and tank tops, babies in tow, seemingly schedule- and … Continue reading Summer mom
It’s 2:21 a.m. and I’m wide awake, snug in my bed. My toddler son, who is fighting a cough, finally nodded off an hour ago after a never-ending interlude of cuddling, shushing and patting. Eyes squeezed shut, I try and will myself to join him in peaceful slumber. But half a dozen worries crowd my … Continue reading Counting the joy
I've been thinking a lot lately about attention. Lately it feels like everything is scrambling for my attention. Unread emails. Missed text messages. Facebook notifications. Shows to watch. Articles to read. New podcasts to play. The pull of infinite content, waiting to be consumed. Do you feel it too? We have work to do, bills … Continue reading Holy attention
Know what I realized lately? So much of the creative process (and life) is about getting out of your head and following your heart. Noticing your inner critic—who says you can’t make anything original/you’re not talented/you don’t have a story to tell/you can’t finish that project/etc.—and flipping her script. Talking back, then moving ahead. Wanna … Continue reading Spring cleaning
Writing is a lot like yoga. Want to do crow pose? You have to put in time on the mat before taking flight. So you practice & practice & practice. You come to your mat and put in the work. It takes courage. Discipline. Some days you fall. Some days it seems like you’re never … Continue reading Keep practicing
For so many—myself included—Mother’s Day is complicated. The day I became a mother was ... complicated. After hours of labor and an emergency C-section, I almost lost my son. He wasn’t breathing when the doctor delivered him. I kept waiting to hear his cries, but all I heard was silence. Then nurses calling for backup. … Continue reading The boy who lived
Usually when we come home from work and daycare it’s straight indoors for dinner, bath, stories, bedtime. But tonight the May showers broke, the air was warm and it smelled like daffodils and sweet, wet grass. Tonight we lingered outdoors. You toddled around the sidewalk, marveled at the growing plants and dug in the garden, … Continue reading A change of forecast
Last month I was invited to share my call story with some young leaders in the church. Now, you might be wondering, "What's a call story?" A call story is a phrase pastors and other Christians use to describe how God led them into ministry. Although I have the privilege of bearing witness to others' faith … Continue reading My call story
“So... what’s your marriage like now?” I remember asking friends after they had babies. Since we became a family of three, I’m finding the answer to this question isn’t easy to distill into a soundbite. It's better as a story . . . On our first date after Jack was born, my husbnd I try … Continue reading Marriage after baby